Friday 31 October 2014

An answer to a comment on my status “ The Trouble Tree”

Quote : Priyanka Nale Nice article Ajay Uncle! Would love to share. But what about the corporates like us we take their laptops & blackberries home? Should we be hanging them on the trouble trees as well... ? Just a thought, now that we are expected to answer emails on phones, even at odd hours ...

@ Priyanka:

Two things: 

Firstly: Is it laid down in your terms and conditions of service that you have to carry your Laptop and Cell phone home to attend to calls?
Secondly does your job description entail you to work from home? If the answer is no then there is no need to hang your Black berries and LT’s on the trouble Tree, because you can lock them up in your drawer on your cube farm.

1. The three major behavior patterns of work that interferes with personal life are unhappiness with the amount of time for non – work activities, followed by missing personal activities due to work and finally putting personal life on hold because of work. 

2. The two major factors impacting the work-life balance of employees are, feeling exhausted at the end of a days work and quitting their jobs or taking a career break because of work-life balance issues. 

3. Major work related factors interfering with personal life, are carrying company cell phones/Laptops home so that the employees can be reached after normal business hours, and checking e-mail or voice mail at home after returning from work. 

Do you always quote “On any given day, I never leave office before 7 PM and so does everybody else”, “We can be expected to work on weekends as well, and nobody refuses. It’s just how it works or that is how things are done out here.” Well then think some more. Remember the 5 monkey story? 

An experiment was conducted in which five monkeys were placed in a cage together with a banana hanging high on a rope outside the reach of the monkeys. A step ladder was placed in the cage that would enable the monkeys to reach the banana. Whenever one of the monkeys attempted to climb and reach for the banana, ALL monkeys were sprayed with freezing cold water.
After a few attempts, all the monkeys learned the association between reaching for the banana and the group collective punishment of being sprayed with freezing water. There was no longer need for the water; no monkeys would attempt to reach the banana.
The researcher then replaced one of the five monkeys with a new monkey. The new monkey, not aware of the icy water treatment, tried to reach for the banana. Within a fraction of a second the other four monkeys attacked him again and again, until he no longer tried to reach the banana. One by one, the monkeys who had experienced the original icy water treatment were replaced by a new monkey. With the introduction of each new monkey, the other monkeys would attack him until he quit trying for the banana.
Eventually, the cage was populated by five new monkeys, none who had experienced the icy water treatment. The experimenter then introduced a new monkey to the cage. When this monkey tried to reach for the banana, all five monkeys attacked him.
The story goes that even though none of these monkeys knew about the collective punishment of icy water, as they had never experienced it, somewhere along the way they learnt that reaching for bananas is not allowed. They become the guardians of this rule without knowing its origin and purpose.
Culture is created over time, and often habits and practices are instilled and repeated without anyone knowing the origin of the behavior. But just to be accepted, most people diligently follow these behaviors, or the others in the group will work to reinforce and maintain the current culture. If “That isn’t how we do things here,” ask the question “Why?”
A normal day’s work should be from 9 AM to 5 PM but that rarely works for a good percentage of employees. Most work beyond the office hours, and leaving office two hours late appears to be the norm in many organizations. Alternately the boss stays on so we have to.
It is no secret that professionals do work hard, with heavy workloads. This kind of overtime takes its toll on employees. Employee burnout due to work overload and overtime is a common phenomenon.
Working longer hours than what the contract stipulates may become a part of life but it does lead to burnout, and the suffering only aggravates when there is no reward in cash or kind.
Generally employees work longer than their contracted hours. In fact statistically one in four works overtime every day of the week in any multinational. Working a few extra hours when required should be an acceptable proposition for employees, the problem arises when it becomes the norm rather than exception.
Nevertheless, time-management has a big role to play here. The problem can largely be contained if employees are efficient and smart enough to finish their work on time. Salaried workers should be able to complete their work in the allocated time outlined in their contract. Of course, there are times when employees would be expected to work overtime to manage spikes in workloads, and most employees would be happy to oblige.
Employees have to look at their efficiencies, how can they get their job done in less time? If employees are honest with themselves about their own productivity and put in place time-saving processes, one may find overtime is unnecessary. Overtime should not be grudged if it’s once in a while. Most companies expect their employees to be a little flexible when it comes to working a little extra and beyond the standard hours. Employers don’t like clock watchers.
But if employees believe the quantum of work is increasing beyond their scope and longer days have become the norm, they need to sit down with their boss and thrash the issue out before it becomes too frustrating for them and starts affecting their productivity.
In such a situation, employees should raise this with their boss and explain that either an increase in salary is fair to compensate for additional hours or additional support is required.
I remember my daughter Manorama, who used to work for Schneider Electric out of Grenoble, France, saying that while working in France she used to feel a bit frustrated as nobody would wait even a minute more than the stipulated time after office hours, carrying work home was a far cry, unless it was an emergency. Further on Friday evenings preceding the week end, all employees would literally disappear from the “Face of the earth”. Beaches mostly.
I have seen Vietnam a very poor developing country, very closely and for long periods of time. I find even though being a Communist Country, the private life of employers is highly respected vis a vis work. In short even they have got their Life-Work Balance right. Sometimes I feel something went wrong in our typical Indians Psyche while trying to adjust to cultures of a new age company.
It is we Indians I find, who tend to carry work home, mix up private time with work, so also carry an emotional chip on shoulders regarding performance. Our ideas about
Ambitiousness, Integrity and looking good are I think totally misplaced. It is also my observation that sometimes, Indians carry work home in terms of Lap Tops and Cell phones to escape from too many joint family members their complications and rituals, which to them become unbearable at times, so work affords a good escape route.
Lastly I also find that Indians always bring emotions into play all the time. Meaning whatever they do, work, family, looking after parents dealing with subordinates and bosses, it is always looked at from an emotional plane or very close to carrying out emotional blackmail. Maybe with their own selves or with others.
Bringing emotions into everything is never a good idea. No doubt that emotions are an intrinsic part of our biological make up, and every morning they march into the office with us and influence our behavior. They play a significant role in the kind of work an employee produces, and the relationship he or she enjoys in the organization. Yet one has to have a pragmatic view of Work/life balance. In its broadest sense, Work/life balance is defined as a satisfactory level of involvement or ‘fit’ between the multiple roles in a person’s life. In this climate managing the boundary between home and work is becoming more challenging. Organizations have to ensure they not just encourage but mandate a practical and workable work/life balance policy, benefiting and meeting the needs of both the organization and its employees. Organizations not providing real opportunity for employees work/life balance are opening themselves up to increasing numbers of dissatisfied and unproductive employees and hence increased attrition rates. Merely creating a work/life policy framework is not enough; fostering an organizational culture that supports the use of available policies is also of great importance. Further there is a need for employers and employees alike to find flexible and innovative solutions that maximize productivity without damaging employees well being, their family relationships and other aspects of life.

We have to move beyond all the above and think what could make our life more meaningful to us and our near and dear ones. We have to change our thinking from our present day restrictive mode which, coupled to our learned/programmed nature and behavior patterns, produces an inner being or state which we are totally dissatisfied and frustrated with. Ultimately to think in a way which goes way beyond our present patterns and reflects in a total paradigm shift in our total Being.

Our endless sufferings
are the roots of  illness.

When mortals are alive,
They worry about death.
When they are full,
They worry about hunger.
Theirs is the great uncertainty.

But one must not consider the past.
And not worry about the future.
Nor should we cling to the present.
From moment to moment
We must follow our inner selves or the voice from within.

If you haven’t awakened
To this great Truth,
Then your time on this earth is likely to be 
like a guided missile which has lost its guidance system.

Lastly but most importantly, one must remember that if one can achieve an inner sense of joyfulness, of contentment and solitude, there will never be a reason to prove anything to anyone including your own self. 
I am sure when you come home to roost every evening, your loved near and dear ones will like to see you serene,contended and joyful.....

Contentment is like a serene lake
That reflects the sun, the moon,
The stars, the trees, the birds ,
Everything that comes near it.
It is totally within itself
And also reflects the beauty
of nature.

As calm as it is in its equipoise,
It allows the water creatures
To move about
Without being disturbed by them.
The fish move, the weeds move,
Yet the lake is very calm.


It also offers its own nature,
Contentment to those who are disturbed
Or anguished or simply lonely
And who find solace in the company
Of its still waters.

A seeker too,
Must cultivate
The stillness of contentment.

Contentment is the garment
Of one who has become
Completely established
In the heart of all hearts.


A person cannot see his own image in flowing  water
But sees it in water that is tranquil.
Only that which remains at rest itself
Can become the resting place
For all those who wish to seek rest.

For us to achieve this we must practice sitting in silence

        THE ART OF DOING NOTHING OR SITTING SILENTLY

1. This is the art of doing nothing.

2. Can be done very easily by everybody. It does not take up too much time. It is required to be done 3 times a day for 20 minutes at a time.

3. Benefits : Relaxes the body, the brain/intellect and helps to alleviate all kinds of Stresses. This sitting silently allows the body to get rid of stress producing hormones and proteins like Cortisol and DEOH. Plus it also helps in producing Serotonin which is the chemical which makes us feel happy and joyful. Most importantly it gives rest to the mind. Meaning it carries out maintenance of our thinking mind. Further you will find that over a time you will require less sleep at night. Importantly you will train your thinking mind to let go of thoughts ( let thoughts come and go), and not react every time. So in your day to day life you will not react to negative experiences, those are also finally thoughts. These thoughts will come again but now you will not react but respond logically.

4. While sitting silently for 20 minutes we will not focus on 
anything, or on any thoughts. It is simply an art of doing nothing.

5. Remove your belt so that you are comfortable. Remove your glasses. Sit in a straight backed chair your buttocks touching the back of the chair. You must have support for your back.  Ankles crossed. Sit straight. However your head should be slightly bent forward from the neck to attain a comfortable position. Keep your hands in your lap, palms facing upwards, the palm of your right hand sitting in the palm of your left. If the chair has arm rests you may rest your elbows on the rest if you feel comfortable otherwise need not. Now close your eyes. Please tell your family members or friends not to disturb you in any way for 20 minutes. If anything is urgent they must only tap you on the head. You may come out of silence as explained later.

6. Relax your feet and toes, then your ankles, then calf muscles, then your thigh muscles, then your stomach, chest, shoulders, neck, arms, wrists and hands. Sit silently in this state. Let your thoughts come and let them go. Do nothing, do not try to stop your thoughts importantly do not get involved in your thoughts, let them come and let them go. Even sounds or smells from outside are thoughts let them come and let them go. Example a thought comes to you that you have to ring up your boss at 8 o clock about an important client message, now don’t start thinking what will the boss say, can you keep the client happy etc. That is getting involved, let that thought come and let it go. Similarly you hear a motor cycle horn outside don’t get involved in the sound by thinking who must it be now in the morning etc. let it come and let it go. Just do nothing. 

In the beginning there will be hundreds of thoughts coming and going gradually they will reduce and you will have periods without any thoughts. Starting maybe 10-15 secs you will have no thought periods, slowly over the days , weeks, months, years these periods without thoughts will increase. We have to achieve nothing, nothing will happen, do not have expectations as to this will happen or that will happen. Just continue 3 times a day for 20 minutes. If your head bends forward more let it. No problems. But do not let it bend backwards and take support/rest against a wall or something, the moment your head gets support/rests against a wall you might fall asleep. You may fall asleep initially if you are too stressed. Do not worry when you wake up don’t get up suddenly you may feel groggy, continue sitting silently till your 20 minutes are up.

7.  Coming out of silence. Initially you can set your mobile or clock alarm for 20 minutes. After some practice you will automatically know that 20 minutes are up. For coming out of silence, do not open your eyes. Move your hands first, rub your palms against each other, wipe your face with your hands, then wipe your arms and wrists, stretch your hands to the front once or twice. Then slowly blink your eyes 3-4 times, close them again for a few seconds then again open them very slowly. If you feel like sitting sit there for 3-4 minutes before getting up do sit.

8. Conditions. There are’t too many conditions. You must be a little bit hungry and a little bit tired that’s all. Therefore the right times are just before you have breakfast, before lunch and before dinner in the evening. You can practice this type of silence in a train, a bus or anywhere. There are no conditions except you must have some support/rest for your back. People at home or in office may make fun of you, do not worry. In the office you can easily spend 15- 20 minutes of your lunch time for meditating before lunch. It does not take more than 15 minutes to have lunch. This will be time well spent than just gossiping. Others will soon follow you.

Music for sitting silently   https://sites.google.com/site/ajayukidve/mp3 


The shadows of evening grow deep
While love comes in
To sooth every mind and body.
Look out towards the West 
And see the fading light of the sun.
Look within yourself
and  see an endless  sky of light.

Drink the nectar
From the petals of your heart
And let the waves
Sweep through your body.

What glory in the ocean !  Listen !
The sound of conches!
The sound of bells ! Kabir says,
“ O brother, listen! The Lord of all
Is playing  His song within you”
                                      

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